Showing posts with label Ninja. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Ninja. Show all posts
Friday, April 10, 2009
Ninja: High School Dance Edition
This thirsty Ninja's got some serious balls. And now, possibly mono.
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
True Story Tuesday: The Lake Ninja
There should definitely be more true-life stories about Ninjas. My bestie and I both think so. Fortunately, we both have our own.
In this story my husband is actually the Ninja, which makes me a very proud wife.
This occurred in the wee hours of the morning, one drunken summer night at our favorite local lake. After a steady intake of Keystone Light for approximately 12 hours, my hubby and a small group of our drunken lake friends who were not yet passed out decided they needed to get something out of the boat house. When they got to the boat house, they realized that one of the drunkard's parents were in there sleeping.
"Dammit!" one drunk-ass exclaimed in a whisper that was almost louder than regular speech, "Now we can't get in there to get that shit!"
"Hey," my husband drunk-whispered back. "I GOT this! I'm jus' gonna sneak in there an' get it. I got this.... I'm a fucking ninja."
The fucking ninja then proceeded to enter the boat house with elephant-like reflexes, knocking over only a few random items which rattled to the floor, waking up the parents. Upon successful completion of the mission, he extricated himself from the boat house with the item.
"See? I told you... I'm a fucking ninja."
To all you ninjas out there... Keep on keepin' on.
In this story my husband is actually the Ninja, which makes me a very proud wife.
This occurred in the wee hours of the morning, one drunken summer night at our favorite local lake. After a steady intake of Keystone Light for approximately 12 hours, my hubby and a small group of our drunken lake friends who were not yet passed out decided they needed to get something out of the boat house. When they got to the boat house, they realized that one of the drunkard's parents were in there sleeping.
"Dammit!" one drunk-ass exclaimed in a whisper that was almost louder than regular speech, "Now we can't get in there to get that shit!"
"Hey," my husband drunk-whispered back. "I GOT this! I'm jus' gonna sneak in there an' get it. I got this.... I'm a fucking ninja."
The fucking ninja then proceeded to enter the boat house with elephant-like reflexes, knocking over only a few random items which rattled to the floor, waking up the parents. Upon successful completion of the mission, he extricated himself from the boat house with the item.
"See? I told you... I'm a fucking ninja."
To all you ninjas out there... Keep on keepin' on.
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
Important Message from The BUNG Blog
The BUNG blog is getting more kick-ass every day. And we can't think of a better way to celebrate this fact than to bring you a weekly video featuring the man who embodies kick-assness. The man who destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise. The man who can lead a horse to water AND make it drink. The man who's beard-wearing ability is seconded only by his acting ability.
Introducing:
The CHUCK NORRIS Clip of the Week
brought to you by The BUNG Blog!
Check in weekly for tips on how to stare down a bear,
or how to ruin just about any scene you may appear in!
And if you don't like it, I'll roundhouse your ass.
Introducing:
The CHUCK NORRIS Clip of the Week
brought to you by The BUNG Blog!
Check in weekly for tips on how to stare down a bear,
or how to ruin just about any scene you may appear in!
And if you don't like it, I'll roundhouse your ass.
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
True Story Tuesday: Ninja Edition
Since it's been an entire week since we blogged, we thought we'd throw a couple more TRUE STORIES your way to feed your bunger. Since we're ninja and all, we'll each share a ninja story.
My story takes place the night of the infamous "knee cancer." I was at a Widespread Panic concert in June of 2006. The booze was flowing, to say the least. Our group of 4 consumed 2 bottles of rum & too many beers to count while tailgating preshow. Once inside the gates, we ran into some friends from my home town and decided to kick it with them throughout the show.
Trying to keep up with the boys, I found myself drinking at their pace, but getting much more drunk. I was nearly kicked out for using my "forbidden" camera that I snuk in. As a compromise, the security guard let me stay in exchange for confiscating my camera. The booze kept flowing and we all kept dancing. At one point, I stood on my seat so I could see better. I kept dancing tho. Not a bright idea. Next thing I know, I'm falling into the next row of people and busted my knee open (hence the "knee cancer"). By the time I stood up, there was blood all down my leg from knee to ankle. My friends begged me to go to the infirmary, but I did not want to miss the concert. Eventually, they went without me and brought back alcohol swabs and bandages. They cleaned me up and bandaged my knee, against my will. Something about having battle scars from concerts makes me feel ninja. So as soon as they were finished bandaging my wound, I notoriously ripped the bandage from my knee and exclaimed "I'm a NINJA!"
And that, my friends, is a true story.
As a brief follow-up, we had our annual lake party just days later. My knee ended up getting infected from swimming in dirty lake water. It took months to heal and left a brutal scar, which is why we refer to any injury that lasts more than a month as cancer. I realize it is not funny to joke about cancer, and karma will one day prove that to me.
My story takes place the night of the infamous "knee cancer." I was at a Widespread Panic concert in June of 2006. The booze was flowing, to say the least. Our group of 4 consumed 2 bottles of rum & too many beers to count while tailgating preshow. Once inside the gates, we ran into some friends from my home town and decided to kick it with them throughout the show.
Trying to keep up with the boys, I found myself drinking at their pace, but getting much more drunk. I was nearly kicked out for using my "forbidden" camera that I snuk in. As a compromise, the security guard let me stay in exchange for confiscating my camera. The booze kept flowing and we all kept dancing. At one point, I stood on my seat so I could see better. I kept dancing tho. Not a bright idea. Next thing I know, I'm falling into the next row of people and busted my knee open (hence the "knee cancer"). By the time I stood up, there was blood all down my leg from knee to ankle. My friends begged me to go to the infirmary, but I did not want to miss the concert. Eventually, they went without me and brought back alcohol swabs and bandages. They cleaned me up and bandaged my knee, against my will. Something about having battle scars from concerts makes me feel ninja. So as soon as they were finished bandaging my wound, I notoriously ripped the bandage from my knee and exclaimed "I'm a NINJA!"
And that, my friends, is a true story.
As a brief follow-up, we had our annual lake party just days later. My knee ended up getting infected from swimming in dirty lake water. It took months to heal and left a brutal scar, which is why we refer to any injury that lasts more than a month as cancer. I realize it is not funny to joke about cancer, and karma will one day prove that to me.
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